[[There's a phone.]]
((It's surrounded by labels pointing at features of the phone.  These are presented counterclockwise from the top.))
((The following arrow points at a lozenge along the top edge of the screen.))
<-- Always-on speaker
<-- MaxHD: Over 350 pixels per screen
<-- Volume and density control
<-- FitBit(r) Fitness Evaluator
<-- Dog noticer
<-- 3D Materials
<-- OS by StackOverflow(r)
((The following arrow points at a button on the bottom edge of the screen.))
<-- Scroll lock
((The following arrow points at an opening on the bottom edge of the phone, where a charger would typically go.))
<-- Coin Slot
((The following arrow points at a small drawer where one would expect a SIM card to fit.))
<-- Bug drawer
<-- Cries if lost
<-- Cheek toucher
<-- Googleable
<-- Waterproof (Interior only)
<-- Ribbed
<-- Auto-rotating case
((The following arrow points at dots above the top edge of the screen.))
<-- Blood Pressure Reliever
Introducing
The xkcd Phone 2
A Phone For Your Other Hand(r)

{{Title text: Washable, though only once.}}