[[A man and a woman are talking together as they walk away from a cinema]]
Man: Another summer gone without a mindless big-budget action movie.
Woman: Huh? Die Hard was nothing BUT action!
Man: No, it was too talky.
Woman: What? Too talky?
Man: I tallied it minute-by-minute. It's at least 60% people walking and talking. ALL those movies are.
Man: Just once, I want a real action movie. 30 seconds of exposition followed by a perfect 90-minute action scene. One with a huge budget, a good choreographer, and a great director.
Woman: And they should center it around some character we already know, someone we never get tired of watching.
Man: I think we've got something here...
[[A movie poster is shown]]
Movie Poster: Coming this summer
Movie Poster: River Tam
Movie Poster: Beats up EVERYONE
[[The movie shows a line of houses, there are people beat up and lying in doorways, out of windows, and on the sidewalk. River Tam is doing a flying kick into someone's face]]
{{title text: By my count, only 48 of the 158 minutes in Live Free or Die Hard have action.  That's pathetic, guys.  Crank is better, but needs a bigger budget and more Summer Glau.}}