[[A man with a combover, a book, and a clipboard approaches black-hat man.]]
Combover: You should check us out. We're the fastest-growing religion in the country.
Black hat: "Fastest-growing" is such a dubious claim.
Combover: It's true! We grew by 85% over the past year.

((Between panels.))
[[Black hat man shouts to someone out of frame.]]
Black hat: Hey, Rob -- wanna join my religion?
Rob: Sure, whatever.

[[Black hat man turns back to Combover and produces a notepad and pen.]]
Black hat: Well, looks like my religion grew by 100% this year.

[[Black hat man begins to walk away.]]
Combover: We have 38,000 members!
Black hat: Hope they're all ok with second place.

{{Title text: I lead a small but extraordinarily persuasive religion whose only members are door-to-door proselytizers from other faiths.}}